Girl: "Ms. Wold, do you know how to change diapers and make a bottle?"
Me: "No."
Girl: "You better call my mom. She can teach you."
Boy 1: "Ms Wold,
Isla can hear things?"
Me: "Yes! I bet she is getting really smart!"
Boy 2: "Ms. Wold, I think
Isla will probably know how to multiply and write [friendly] letters when she is born."
Boy: "How does the baby get inside your tummy?"
Me: "I have no idea. I think it's magic."
Girl: "No, you have to sleep with someone to get pregnant."
Boy: "What?!" I sleep with my mom sometimes.
Me: (Panicking) No, babies only come when you pray real hard for them. It doesn't matter where you sleep. It is pretty much just like magic. Trust me."
Boy: "Ms. Wold, are you going to be here on the last day of school?"
Me: "Yes."
Boy: "You are going to be huge then!"
Boy: "How will the baby get out of you?"
Me: "The doctor will cut open my tummy and take her out."
Girl: "My brother thought babies came out of your mouth. I told him they come out of your butt."
"What if
Isla is born without a head?"
(As I was about to eat a mini
candy bar)
"Ms Wold, you should probably eat 2 of those. One for you and one for
Isla. It wouldn't be fair if you didn't give
Isla one."
"Ms. Wold you need new clothes. Your clothes are getting too tight. Do you know they have special clothes for pregnant people?"